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Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Deja Vous

From, definition 2...

a. An impression of having seen or experienced something before: Old-timers watched the stock-market crash with a distinct sense of déjà vu.
b. Dull familiarity; monotony: the déjà vu of the tabloid headlines.

I have had continuing digestive problems since February of 2006, but figuring out that gluten was my enemy (about a year later) helped improve things immensely. Through the 2 1/2-ish years since then, I have had times when I consumed hidden gluten and have experienced the tell-tale signs--bad stomach pain, outbreak of mouth sores, other things I don't want to type--and then I have to evaluate what I took in: Was it an ingredient I missed? (Gluten is found in wheat, rye, oats and barley and comes in more forms than you can measure with the human eye.) Was it a cross-contamination issue? Did this contamination occur in my home or at the place of origin of the food I consumed?

You might think that avoiding gluten should be an easy thing, and honestly, I am just not seeing other gluten-free bloggers out there posting about this, but it is very, very hard. The only time I truly feel safe eating food is when I eat at home, having cooked for myself, having opened the containers for the first time or using my own hands off foods that have been labeled with my trusty Sharpie that no one else bothers (so I know that no one else in the house has inadvertantly contaminated them). Under these conditions, I can usually go many days/weeks without pain. I love those times.

Right now, I am in pain, but I am not sure that it is gluten. I am like I was before I broke with gluten. I am like I was in the weeks after my gallbladder surgery (November of 2006) when the doctor did an MRI because he thought that either there was a blockage or he had done damage during the surgery. The MRI was clear. It wasn't until I quit gluten that my body started healing and the pain went away. But it is back and I don't know why.

I am going to go see my doctor, but I can't get in until June 30 (she is good, and worth waiting for). Between now and then, I will be tredding lightly in the food area. Cooked vegetables, fruits, juices, and whatever else I take in will be in small quantities and with caution. Food causes pain. Period. I will also be praying and spending time in the Word, trusting in God's sovereignty and resting in Him. Specifically, I will be praying that He gives me strength, endurance, and a right attitude as I carry on doing what is needed.


Kim said...

I'm sorry you are in pain. My mother has Crohn's disease and food very frequently makes her have pain, too.

Hope you feel better soon!

Becky, slave of Christ said...

Thank you, Kim, I appreciate your kindness. Crohn's disease is awful. I am so sorry your mother has it.

People are obviously blind when they can't see the fallen condition of this world. Our decaying bodies are proof.